It's 4am, Weds morning and I'm barely laying down onto my beautifully neglected bed. Sighs of relief, frustration, and exhaustion overcome me. Sighh
It's been one of the most stressful months of my life. But as a wise monkey once said, it's only through the painful, stressful, and difficult times that you can actually learn.
Truth be told, sistah, truth be told.
I suppose it would be fitting to tell you how our show went. Approximately 21 hours of work spread out through three consecutive days were dedicated to setting up and completing all our work for this show. We (the class) strapped arms and pulled through, I'm so proud. Proud that despite all the differences, despite all the previous experiences, we were all able to work together. Cheesy but true.
Unfortunately there was some things said by faculty members, and yes it bothers me. It bothers me that anyone would try to bring us down on our big day. It bothers me that someone (in a professional position) would say something behind your back and smile that big ole fake smile in your face. And worse of all, it bothers me that this bothers me.
Negativity surrounds our lives every day. It is more about how you handle the situation that makes you stronger. So though things were said, feelings were hurt, the honest truth is that "haters are going to hate" only you can decide what advice, criticism, comments, and observations you want to accept. Life is like that. Everyone thinks they are right and everyone has an opinion.
I am not yet ready to let go but writing this out definitely helps. I look back on my seven (yes, seven) years of schooling and I do feel proud of what I've accomplished and what I've learned. It is only through these experiences where I learned my strengths and I'm going to share what I honestly believe I have gained:
1. I am a very hard worker
2. I am not the best designer
3. I have good leadership qualities
4. I cannot rest until I am done
5. I am responsible
6. I cannot let things go
7. I do think very negatively about myself. Insecurity is a great personal vice.
8. I am willing to learn
9. I have a lot to say but I believe in keeping some things to myself. I realized that there are things I could have shared to save my reputation, I could put someone else down to make myself feel better, I could complain a whole lot more to these authority figures outside of my peers. But I am just not that person.
10. I am who I am. I do the type of work that I like. I cannot and will not change just to fit anyone else.
This is an honest list of myself. Sometimes I think that being honest in this blog may end up in criticism by others but where else can I share?! =D
For now, all I can really think about is the fact that I am actually done with school. Just walking on Friday and it will be official. But yes, at this very second, I am done with school. I'm going to let that sink in and come back stronger than yesterday. Name that song.